The Pain Map

I debated putting this post on my old blog
www.singlemominacomplicatedworld.blogspot.com
because in some ways
its a 'single' mom
heart issue..
but in other ways,
its so much more!

My middle child has migraines.
When we were called about her MRI
the nurse said there is a "pain MAP or PATH" in the brain!
When a headache comes on,
it knows the path to follow.
after a while..
there is no build up-
the pain just hits
in all its glory!

I have thought about this
'pain map' ever since!
I believe that our heart has this too!
I believe that when your heart
was once broken,
even after is heals-
it remembers the path that pain followed-
and when something else threatens it:
we get our feelings hurt,
we take a risk and get burned,
we hope only to face disappointment...
there is no longer a slow build up of pain-
instead the ache that hits
can take you to your knees.
The heart remembers-
it feels,
and the pain follows the map
it has read before.

I am watching a friend,
who has been devastated in ways
no parent should know!
The loss of her beautiful son
just 7 months ago..
facing brain surgery with her 13 month old
this week...
and I imagine her heart must feel broken
all of the time.
Her pain map
never having time
to fold itself up,
and put itself away!!

I grieve for her!
and as I grieve..
my heart remembers the path
it followed to brokenness..
and it breaks just a bit at a time;
all over again!