accepting the inevitable

so I admit..
I get tired!
I get tired of doing it all..
I get tired of not having someone
else to pick up where I leave off..
I get tired of nights alone,
and checking my oil,
and mowing my yard.
I get tired...

But,
then I accept!
I accept that a lot rests on my shoulders...
but, a lot has been gained
by my independence.

I decide
to face the stress!!
Manage it..
let it swallow me in moments,
and then dig my way out!

I let go...
I do what I can!
I delegate what I should!
I ask where I must!
and I move on!


Some weeks are frustrating,
and some weeks are liberating!
Some weeks are maddening,
and some weeks full of hope.
Some weeks are disappointing,
and some weeks are exciting!!
and some weeks???
all of the above!!


But, each moment
and week..
needs to be accepted!
owned,
and learned from...
and then;
the next moment has a chance
to begin!

Learning to Let go

One of the first steps
in becoming
comfortable with 'me'..
was letting go
of what I expected,
anticipated...
and even
dreamed!

Its letting go
of ideals
and being comfortable
with reality!

As a mom,
its accepting
what I can do!
And forgiving myself
for the things
I cannot!

As a friend,
its being there
as much as possible..
but knowing my boundaries,
and accepting
that I will sometimes
fail.

As a sister and daughter,
its being true to me
and true to the legacy
I was raised with!
Its being loyal
and loving deeply..
and its accepting
that I will sometimes
disappoint!

And as woman..
its striving always to do better!
Working to be more,
learn more,
become more...
but sometimes
accepting
that in this moment-
this is the most
I can manage!
This is the best I can be!
Tomorrow,
may be different...
but today
I accept where I am;
and let go
of where I thought I would be
instead!

Single..but more!

For the last 3 years
I have blogged the journey
of being single..

and suddenly
I came to understand,
that I have come to
be so much more!

I am single!
Sure!
but, I am also
so comfortable
being me!
I am learning
how to be true
to myself!
and how to live
with purpose!
NOT because I am single..
but because I am
ME!

and so...
this blog is going
in a different direction!
The journey
of 'just' learning
to be
JUST me!